7 HABITS OF HIGHLY HAPPY PEOPLE by AZYA MAXTON!!!!

7 Habits of Highly Happy People

       I am not always rainbows and roses, nirvana and namaste-but u knew that already, right? As I spoke with a writer girlfriend yesterday, she echoed my concerns about writing blogs that are intended to help people when we, ourselves, are not doing so well. I told her that it had stricken me when I read the line recently somewhere "It's okay not to be okay."  How can I write a blog about happiness if I  have not mastered the habits? Wouldn't that be hypocritical?  Nevertheless, I had committed myself to writing a blog about the Habits of Happiness, part of my 2012 Vision Board--when two different people told me this year that I am one of the happiest people they know--I thought if they only knew about my inclination towards depression, they'd understand why I WORK so hard at being happy. My lows are VERY low and sometimes it seems as if I will never rise again, but I always do. Still, as I have grown- I have learned the PRACTICES that work for me. I stole a quote from a friend earlier this summer that stated "Discipline is simply desire that has become smart and has learned what works." I have written about these practices before in my blogs, and in my book, but in this note, I will go into just a little more detail about them.

 

1. Writing-I have oft stated that if I were president, everyone would be required to have at least one year of good counseling and a journal.  When I write, I learn more about myself and my own thoughts and where I really am. My journal is also where I can vent, and be nasty and negative even, without hurting anyone with my very powerful words and thoughts-which I am learning to take responsibility for. In the book "The Artists Way" -the author, Julia Cameron, suggests that we write 3 pages every morning, simply called "The Morning Pages." When I make the time (started to write "have" the time-but let's be honest here)-my 3 pages usually look something like one page of free thought, sometimes what I dreamt about or what I went to sleep or woke up thinking about, a second page of to-do lists, I sometimes budget here as well, and a third page of either affirmations or gratitude. I'll try to post a pic of these later.

 

2. Reading-I am a good teacher because I am a good student. I am a good writer because I am a good reader. I absorb self-help and spiritual materials constantly in order to shape my thoughts and visions.

 

3. Exercise-The YMCA next door to my house is my happy place. Having sooo much that I want to do, and a mind that rarely stays still, cardio is an excellent conduit for my anxiety-turning anxiety into adrenaline which usually leaves me sweaty, smiling and singing along to my I-pod. I do NOT exercise without music, and so my Y time is also a great time for me to meditate musically with upbeat songs that also inspire me artistically. Also, as a metaphysician, I believe in a mind/body connection-so when I am feeling weak, I lift weights. Unbalanced-yoga. Out of flow-swimming, Stagnant or stuck-walking. You get my drift. I don't exercise as consistently as I want to, but I do get it in!

 

4. Spirit Work-Someone asked me last month why I go to church. The answer is simply because it works for me. I read an article years ago that asked why people might bother with "religion"-which is really just a set of spiritual practices. There are universal truths in every religion that I have found through experience, work. They include silence, stillness and fasting among others. The article states that if you are able to include these practices on your own, you might not need a "church", but if you do not regularly practice silence, stillness, communion with God-you might benefit from a supportive community of fellow seekers of spirit and truth.

 

5. Friends-I choose to surround myself with people who do similar WORK! Thus, when I am failing to follow these practices-they encourage and uplift me, and vice-versa. My true friends know who I am, flaws and all, and love me anyway. When I fail to be anything, or anyone less than my best self--they check me, and I do the same for them. They also let me vent and complain, so I don't have to bring my negativity to everyone. I have learned that when I want to "empty out" my negative energy, I should check in first, and make sure my friend (or family member) is in a good place to receive it. If they've been doing their WORK, -writing, reading, exercising, praying, meditating, etc. -they usually are. If not, I try to choose someone else. We also remind each other to play, and not take life so seriously. It's really just a game after all-that's why we call them PRACTICES! Again, I don't always get it right, I'm just willing to keep playing! 

 

6. Service and Support-I do believe that to whom much is given, much is required. I am not sure why I have been given so much to do, but I suspect it is because the Power(s) that BE know that I can handle it. I have also learned, through experience, that giving and receiving are one and the same. No matter how down I might be feeling, someone is lower, and when I reach out and offer them a hand, I find that I am, somehow, lifted.  I have had the opportunity to travel to Africa, and witness extreme poverty firsthand. There is not much comparable in the U.S. I've also seen poor people who will give their last canned good and are happier than the rich people I've known (and I've known them) that horde everything. Unfortunately, some of the richest folks I have encountered were the least happy. This is not to say that I don't believe you can't be prosperous and happy. I just know that true joy comes from living your purpose and being in service. I think Oprah's done a fair job of handling it all--but we've never really communicated:) As an actress, I learned to conquer stage fright when I began to concentrate on who might need to hear the story I am telling, rather than my own ego. I tell people all the time, I am more myself on stage than I am almost anywhere else. 

 I am a good performer, because I am a good audience. I am a good artist, because I am a connoisseur of art. I take the time to support my friends and fellow artists and to allow myself to be inspired by their authenticity and expression, even when it's not "all good." 

 

 

7. Expression-I have also admitted in prior blogs, that I learned, years ago in counseling that the depression I was experiencing then was more a result of repressed expression than lost love. I have since found that performing at least once a season and writing frequently keep that monstrous depression at bay-particularly when combined with all of the above mentioned practices. When I am NOT fulfilled artistically, I can tell because I find myself being jealous of fellow artists, when I AM-I can revel in their successes, realizing that we are all connected-and counting them as my own.

 

So there you have it. Some of my secrets, and THESE you can feel free to spread and share.

 

"You can worry, or you can pray. Don't do both"-50 Cent(IT IS NOT JUST IN SOME...IT IS IN EVERYONE!-Marianne Williamson) ...Don't worry. BE HAPPY!:)