It may seem strange to some to have someone 50 years your senior be your best friend but that doesn’t stop it from being my reality. My grandmother is my best friend. We have fun together. I tell her my innermost feelings. She loves me through and through and I love her the same. We spent so much time together. Way before we shared a home, we spent many wonderful hours together.
During this time we did what best friends do. We laughed, we cried, we shared our feelings and experiences. I listened as hard as I could when she would share her experiences. I mean after all, she has 50 years on me…so it wouldn’t be unheard of that she may very well have a great deal more of experiences to impart. Ps: She's the greatest listener...some nights I would talk for what felt like forever...after I was done her ears had smoke coming from them but she was always present and helpful. (I'm so grateful)
If I were asked to describe my grandmother, I would have to say what I’ve always heard her say many times before, simply because it’s what I’ve found to be true...she’s “A little piece of leather but well put together!” As soon as I heard those words spoken from my grandmother’s lips I knew instantly that she had swag in abundance. I knew she was a firecracker and a fire starter! She’s just so, I don’t know, fiery. What a live wire she is! So candid too but at the same time she is hands down hilarious. If I had a dollar for every time she made me scream and shout from the side splitting laughter that I’ve experienced as a result of her humor…I would be living WAY COMFY!! (lol)
We would often go to thrift stores and mirror each other’s excitement when a great find was found. I remember being with her at the thrift store one day and I did what I’d always do when we were there together, I’d ask her “How do you like this or that or the other” (said while holding up different articles of clothing) and she was very forthcoming and she would say just what she thought. She would say things like “That’s alright” or “That’s not much” or “That’s the one there” and as we were chatting it up different people would walk by us and kinda gaze at us tenderly.
One woman went as far as to say to me “Is that your grandmother?” I said “Yes”. She went on to ask “How old is she?” as if my grandmother wasn’t standing right there or as if she was feeble minded or hard of hearing and I assure you she was neither at that time. I’m not sure if I ever answered that question but before I said anything else the woman said “That’s so nice…you spending time with her.” said like I was merely doing my chores but with a pleasant disposition, little did she know that this was my homie, my ace, my girl and I was having the time of my life being in her company. I wasn’t bothered by the comments of this onlooker. The truth is I kinda like that we have our own thing going on that baffles most people because at the end of the day that’s just what it is…it’s OUR thing.
We used to have so much uninterrupted fun, that is until my grandmother fell victim to Alzheimer’s. You may never know how vicious this disease can be until you live with a person who has it. Everything from the mood swings, the forgetfulness, the horrible tricks it plays on the mind, the psychological warfare, the stress, the fatigue…nothing short of a nightmare as I stand there seemingly powerless and as much as it hurts me to see her go through all of this, it hurts even more to know that I could never know the pain she experiences in the depths of her soul to be a shell of her former self…to have to come to grips with the reality that there’s no cure, her wanting to call those who she shared some of her fondest memories with only to be reminded that they are no longer living. Watching the pain of old wounds resurface and become new all over again…it hurts. It just hurts.
I look forward to my visits with her now more than ever…hoping that she’ll never forget me, hoping that she stored up enough great memories of her and I…that no matter what length of time travel her mind may journey on, that I’ll still remain to her a rainbow...both warm & bright, with the most bold beautiful colors ever.
When she has good days I savor them like none other. When she has bad days I do my absolute best to bring her comfort, like she’s done for me countless times before.
If you ever wondered what I feel for you, aside from our hugs and kisses and laughter and long walks and in depth talks...I finally have the words to describe it to you now. You are simply a great gift and blessing. That’s what you are and have been and will continue to be in my mind’s eye. I love you Grannay…You will always be “A little piece of leather but well put together” because of your honesty, your generosity, your kindness, your humor. Inside your personality you were always 10 feet tall and it has been my honor to stand on your spunky shoulders to be acknowledged and made to understand that like you, I too indeed matter. YOU ARE THE GREATEST!!
Xoxo,
Your best friend for life!
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